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Princess from HHLO has a heart to heart with Pretty Tony, author of Playaology and Playa Step Your Game Up, to discuss the books, his inspiration and what makes him qualified to teach the art of the playa.

Princess: So I always like to start at the beginning, Tony. Where are you from?

Pretty Tony: New York, LA, Miami and Vegas. I’m a LA boy for real.

Princess: Alright, tell me a little about your background.

Pretty Tony: Basically just grew up in the street. In my early twenties, I decided I needed a change, moved to Vegas and started my own little body guard service. Started my own entertainment company, Kingston Entertainment. Started pushing these books in the streets.

Princess: Tell me more about the books for someone who hasn’t ever read them.

Pretty Tony: In Playa Step Your Game Up, I was just telling playas the rules and regulations on how you go about being that. And it was more a book about honesty. Once you got beyond the swagger of it, it’s really about being honest and not taking people along for an emotional rollercoaster. So that’s what it’s really about but a lot of times, people hear the name and think it’s about pimping. I’m like nah.

Princess: Well I am looking at the cover right now and that does look like a pimp stick on the front. So you’re right. That was my first thought.

Pretty Tony: (Laughing) I did that by design because there’s an old cliché that goes, ‘never judge a book by its cover.’ Like I said, once you get beyond the swagger, you’ll see in there that it’s asking brothas to keep it real.

Princess: Ok, so what made you want to write these books?

Pretty Tony: What led me to write them?

Princess: Yeah. You woke up one day and something said ‘Hey, write these books.’ What was it?

Pretty Tony: Okay, let’s just say that over my lifetime, I’ve been a very blessed man when it comes to women. I’ve had a charmed life when it comes to women. And so that was my motivating factor. And people around me would always say, “The things you pull off, you need to write a book.”

Princess: So give me an example of that. Give me an example of a situation that your boys look at you and said, “How do you do that?”

Pretty Tony: Without sounding egotistical?

Princess: There’s a difference between egotistical and telling the truth. The truth is the truth.

Pretty Tony: That’s true. The easiest way to put this is that I have a certain rapport with women. They feel comfortable around me and it’s easy for me to conversate with them. I’m very in tune with women because I grew up with a single mother. So a lot of things that the male ego and other brothas don’t have, I have. So one day on a piece of napkin sitting at a buffet with a few of the fellas . . . Matter of fact, no, it started in the back of a strip club one night. And they’re like you should write a book and I’m like no I can’t write no book. And I picked up a napkin that same night and started writing a book. One word led to a sentence. A sentence led to a paragraph. A paragraph led to a chapter. That chapter led to a book.

Princess: Wow. I’ve done a lot of interviews. And I’ve asked people this question many times. “Where did you get the inspiration for your work?” And never has anyone said that it all started in the back of strip club. You are an original, man.

Pretty Tony: (Laughing.) But once you get to know me and get beyond the swagger, you see the honesty of what I am. I am what I am. I’m a product of these streets. I grew up hard and fast with knuckleheads. I just got to a point where I needed to do something with myself and everybody was in the studio and trying to make an album. I ain’t no rapper. And I ain’t trying to start no record label. So I was like, what can I do for myself? And I was like “Whoa. I can put out books for us.” My generation doesn’t have a lot of books for us.

Princess: That’s true. That’s true.

Pretty Tony: As you sit down and get to talk to people, every cat you meet claims he’s a playa. Everybody’s a pimp. And I’m like, what does that mean? What? Cause you sleep with a lot broads, you a playa? I’m like my man, you gotta school up. And like I said, that’s where the book was born. Sleeping with a lot women or having a lot of women does not define you as a playa. And I want everybody out there to know that playas and pimps are two different things.

Princess: Ok so what’s the difference between the two?

Pretty Tony: A playa does not depend on a woman entirely for his source of income. A playa is confident in his swagger. He let’s a woman know that I’m not about to buy you a diamond ring and you get me a $9.99 Wal-Mart necktie. So that’s what a playa is about. A pimp is someone who puts broads on a track to make his money. A playa has his own hustle. He does things for himself but if a broad is willing, her generosity is necessary. I’m not gonna be generous to you and you’re not generous to me. It’s not a one way street. You dig?

Princess: Yeah, I dig. So can a playa be a woman? Or should I say, can a woman be a playa? Just so I have the definition right.

Pretty Tony: Oh hell yes. They are the best kind. That’s another thing brothas don’t like to put out there. That y’all invented the game. Y’all are better at it than we are. Check this. A brotha can go out and sleep with four women in the day and he can go home and he ain’t got no use to himself. A woman can go out and do the same thing. Go home and take a warm bath, ’cause y’all need to soak, and you would never know nothing she’s done. Brothas can’t hide stuff like that. Some of the best playas that I’ve known have been women.

Princess: So who’s your target audience?

Pretty Tony: My target audience is anybody who wants to step their game up. It’s not only about being a playa. That’s what led to Playaology. When I wrote Step Your Game Up, it was too street. One of my white friends was like “Tony, I love you but you need to caucasian-ize this book”. He’s a white guy and I laughed when he said that.

Princess: He just meant that you need to commericailze the book and make it for a broader audience, right?

Pretty Tony: Yeah, I wrote Playaology for the everyday guy. Not just those in the street.

Princess: So these books are kinda like twins separated at birth. They have the same message but they are geared toward different audiences.

Pretty Tony: There are definitely two different favors to them. In Step Your Game Up, I was teaching the swagger and the mindset. In Playaology, I’m basically calling brothas out. I was basically putting the spotlight on us. And you know we brothas are like cockroaches. We don’t like light on us. So I turned the spotlight on us and said “look at us.” I categorize certain kinds of guys that I’ve seen. In Playaology, I’m teaching men that they can be a playa and be a gentleman too. You don’t have to be a gangsta all the time. Pay a woman a compliment. That’s a lost art. Brothas don’t know how to pay a woman a compliment now.

Princess: That’s true. In your dealings with women, where’s the best place to meet women?

Pretty Tony: I can’t tell you that. Anywhere, anytime. It depends on the woman. You can meet her in the club, in church or in a hotel lobby. Anywhere. Her eyes are gone tell you if she’s in the frame of mind to deal with you. It’s a lost art, dealing with women. Even though I put myself out there as a playa, it’s not always about sex. Brothas don’t know how to sit down and have a genuine conversation with a woman. And you’d be surprised how much easier it is dealing with a woman after you get to know here. But we’re not taught that. Especially brothas from the hood. We ain’t never had no role models. The first thing we’re taught is “Yo, get them drawls, kid”. So what separates you is your ability to sit down and get to know a woman. That’s what I’m trying to give these brothas; the ability to connect with a woman. We’re too into machismo and grabbing our dicks.

Princess: Can a playa be with one woman?

Pretty Tony: That’s a personal choice and depends where you are in your life.

Princess: Can you still be a playa if you’re with one woman, though?

Pretty Tony: No.

Princess: So if you decide to be in a monogamous relationship, say get married or something, you have to make a conscious decision to put your playa-hood away. Is that correct?

Pretty Tony: There you go. There comes a time in your life when you have to grow up. It takes a conscious decision to say, “You know what, I’m done. I’ve done did the strip clubs and the parties and the things that I need to do.” But at the same time, it takes a certain caliber of woman to understand you. Because you’re not average and the average games that women play, she can’t come at you with that. Somebody has to grab your attention and understand who you are. And understand the swagger doesn’t go away but your past is your past.

Princess: So are you a playa for life?

Pretty Tony: I’m an elder statesman now. I’m just selling the game. The game is to be sold, not told. I’m an elder statesman. I’ve calmed down. I’ve got my daughters growing up, you dig? I’m in my thirties now and my life is about who I am. Not who I used to be. Who I used to be doesn’t define me. Understand?

Princess: Yeah, living in the present, not the past.

Pretty Tony: There you go. All I have is this moment. I can’t worry about yesterday and I damn sure can’t tell you about tomorrow.

Princess: Now as you describe a playa, you are real specific with that. Not everybody can be a playa. Not everybody can practice Playaology.

Pretty Tony: No, you have to have a certain mindset. And once it takes hold of you, it ain’t never gone let you go. You struggle with it. And you gonna meet a broad one day out of thousands. She may catch your heart, but your mind will always be what it has been. You gone struggle with that. I struggle with that to this day.

Princess: What kinda woman does it take to catch a real playa’s attention and make him think of doing something other than being a playa?

Pretty Tony: She has to see you for who you are in that moment dealing with her and what you bring to her life. That’s all she’s focus on. She can’t worry about who was or wasn’t or might have been. She has to worry about the moment that y’all are in. And that’s where her focus lies. She’s not concerned about the past. That’s what the woman I deal with now does. I don’t need you to remind me of who I used to be. I have the memories for that myself.

Princess: You already know so you don’t need to be reminded, right?

Pretty Tony: I don’t need to be reminded. If the fire’s too hot, get your ass out the kitchen. You shoulda neva brought your ass up in here.

Princess: What’s next for you, Tony? Are we gonna be seeing another book from you?

Pretty Tony: I have two out right now. And I have a novel called Street Dreamz that’s coming out too. My goal is to be the first black publishing powerhouse to come out of the hood.

Princess: It looks like your books are available online but can our readers get them in the store, too?

Pretty Tony: Yeah, they’re available online at Amazon.com or they can download the eBook on iTunes. If they’re not in your local bookstore, you can have them request them and they should be there within a couple of days. But over the next couple of months, they should be in every major store. That’s my goal. That’s my hope.

Princess: One last thing. If I had to leave our readers with one last impression or one last thought about you, what would you want that to be?

Pretty Tony: I am what I am. Don’t try to define what I am. I don’t

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